2017/18 Your Ulster Expectations

[Tender]

We create our own reality man. Nothing is real and everything is real. Don't try to find meaning, just let it wash over you and pay no attention to the bad stuff, it'll harsh your buzz.
Opioids and Guinness...its the future man. Can't you feel it?

[Dave]

True

[bazzaj]

Dave please stay off these substances.
I used to take Ulster are magic mushrooms before every game.
The very same ones that most journalists are on and small partial sits on.
I mean it's great at the time to hallucinate Robbie Diack carrying over the gain line or seeing us throwing straight in the lineout but the come down is hell.

I'll keep taking them because reality is grim.

I can't even if I wanted to.
You know things are bad when your dealer refuses to supply you out of concern.

[Tender]

Yeah, I feel ye man, the Beeatch behind the counter in Boots refused to sell me two boxes of Paramol, so I had to go all the way to Forestside to another Boots, what she didn't count on was Sainsbury's having Guinness on offer so I was like bam, getyousommathatmuhfakahs! Belmont Boys don take nosheeet. Ye dig?

[bazzaj]

Big up to the Belmont Massive!
Are you and the Cherry Valley upstarts still at war?

[Cap'n Grumpy]

We can't beat treviso away, can't see how the dragons will be any different

We beat Treviso and lost to Zebre
Can't see us beating Kings

Shoor everything will be grand .....


.... didn't Les or somebody say we would learn from our mistakes .....








... several times?

[Rooster]

We create our own reality man. Nothing is real and everything is real. Don't try to find meaning, just let it wash over you and pay no attention to the bad stuff, it'll harsh your buzz.
Opioids and Guinness...its the future man. Can't you feel it?

After Guinness and opioids you can feel feck all.

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[Cap'n Grumpy]

We create our own reality man. Nothing is real and everything is real. Don't try to find meaning, just let it wash over you and pay no attention to the bad stuff, it'll harsh your buzz.
Opioids and Guinness...its the future man. Can't you feel it?

After Guinness and opioids you can feel feck all.

Yer nat doin it right.

[Tender]

Paramol up either nostril and stick the open Guinness bottle to yer eyeball. That's how we rolled B4 we took down dem Cherryvalley mufakahs.

[bazzaj]

Yeah but they're only small fry compared to the Malone Road massive or the Stranmillis Sinners

[UlsterNo9]

Decided to re calibrate my expectations, from now to end of season, I'll be happy with the following

1. Logan out - fresh face and structure if being put in place needs to rid itself of old incompetent regime from the top.
2. Top 3 finish in our half of the league.
3. A brand of rugby developed that is attractive to watch.
4. Finishing the season knowing whether the kids (McPhilips, Dalton, Rea et al) are up to it or could be.

[Dave]

Decided to re calibrate my expectations, from now to end of season, I'll be happy with the following

1. Logan out - fresh face and structure if being put in place needs to rid itself of old incompetent regime from the top.
2. Top 3 finish in our half of the league.
3. A brand of rugby developed that is attractive to watch.
4. Finishing the season knowing whether the kids (McPhilips, Dalton, Rea et al) are up to it or could be.

5. A functioning defensive system.

[222toHounslow]

More players to named after breasts.

[Dave]

More players to named after breasts.

Andy War-rack
Rory Breast
Nick Titmoney
Charlies Piutau
Weihann Herbust
Aarons Cans
Luke Marshmallows
Alan O'Knocker

[222toHounslow]

Loving your work Dave