Joke of the Day

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Dave
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by Dave » Thu May 10, 2018 2:58 pm

Setanta wrote:Not at all, the joke is on us!
That is true but Keatley is coming.
I have my own tv channel, what have you got?

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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by big mervyn » Wed May 16, 2018 6:31 pm

I went for a testicular examination this morning.
The little Thai nurse cupped my balls and said "don't worry. It's not unusual to get an erection during this procedure."
I said "I haven't got an erection"
She said "No ... but I have!"
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Dave
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by Dave » Wed May 16, 2018 7:09 pm

Blanai Mcilroianatawat?
I have my own tv channel, what have you got?

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stickinout
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by stickinout » Fri May 18, 2018 7:30 pm

Dave wrote:
Setanta wrote:Not at all, the joke is on us!
That is true but Keatley is coming.

On his own, or with JC?

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monkee
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by monkee » Fri May 18, 2018 7:41 pm

Regarding the costs incurred by Mr Jackson, Mr Kelly said the trial was initially scheduled to last between three to five weeks, but ended up spanning over a period of nine-and-a-half weeks.
Mr Kelly today in court re PJs legal expenses.
There's at least two jokes in there.

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Russ
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by Russ » Sat May 19, 2018 7:20 am

monkee wrote:Regarding the costs incurred by Mr Jackson, Mr Kelly said the trial was initially scheduled to last between three to five weeks, but ended up spanning over a period of nine-and-a-half weeks.
Mr Kelly today in court re PJs legal expenses.
There's at least two jokes in there.
You'll have to spell it out for me
The only joke i see is that it went to trial thanks to a ra lawyer interfering

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monkee
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by monkee » Wed May 23, 2018 6:51 pm

9 1/2 weeks ?
You must have missed the 80s

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Russ
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by Russ » Wed May 23, 2018 8:04 pm

monkee wrote:9 1/2 weeks ?
You must have missed the 80s
Aye
Was quite young

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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by rumncoke » Thu May 24, 2018 10:35 am

Also the guy who'd get the money is the one asking

Plus the person he is asking is the one who decided a trial was warranted -- after looking at the evidence

The only people who gain in the length of the trial
were the lawyers .

And of course the Twitter sisters had more time to harness their bile .


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Russ
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by Russ » Thu May 24, 2018 11:56 am

rumncoke wrote:Also the guy who'd get the money is the one asking

Plus the person he is asking is the one who decided a trial was warranted -- after looking at the evidence

The only people who gain in the length of the trial
were the lawyers .

And of course the Twitter sisters had more time to harness their bile .


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Racist

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Dave
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by Dave » Thu May 24, 2018 12:30 pm

Russ wrote:
rumncoke wrote:Also the guy who'd get the money is the one asking

Plus the person he is asking is the one who decided a trial was warranted -- after looking at the evidence

The only people who gain in the length of the trial
were the lawyers .

And of course the Twitter sisters had more time to harness their bile .


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Racist

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That's why he is ORF
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by rumncoke » Thu May 24, 2018 4:05 pm

racist ??

where


chauvinist maybe

but less so than my father


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BaggyTrousers
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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by BaggyTrousers » Thu May 24, 2018 4:57 pm

rumncoke wrote:racist ??

where


chauvinist maybe

but less so than my father


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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by rumncoke » Thu May 24, 2018 5:06 pm

Baggy

Remember all change is for no change every generation likes to think it is more civilised than the previous .

But the fact is the human race has not advanced one inch

we still torture people but the methods differ


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Re: Joke of the Day

Post by Cap'n Grumpy » Sun Jun 10, 2018 7:03 am

A woman was sure that her husband was cheating on her, and having an affair with the maid. So she laid down a trap.
One evening she suddenly sent the maid home for the weekend and didn't tell the husband.
That night when they went to bed, the husband gave the old story: Excuse me my dear, my stomach aches, and went to the bathroom.
The wife promptly went into the maid's bed. She switched the lights off. When he came in silently, he wasted no time or words but quickly got on top of her...
When he finished and was still panting, the wife said: "You didn't expect to find me in this bed, did you?" And then she switched on the light...
"No madam," said the gardener.
Sadly the days of people using proper English are went

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