Silly Season Limerick Competition

[big mervyn]

It's time to beatify Fit
For making our stadium a hit
It's usually quite full
The bakebookers are cool
Who cares if the atmosphere's sh*t?

[Dave]

Stuck on one about nucifora. What rhymes with Jeremy Hunt?

[Dave]

An Aussie in Dublin has given us a dunt
To the NHS he'd be Jeremy Hunt
He's really quite dumb
Go fetch the gun
Til I chasen this absolute............

[BaggyTrousers]

Stuck on one about nucifora. What rhymes with Jeremy Hunt?

Mike Hunt?

[Polly Cotton]

There once was a poster named Dave
Who Kept a dead whore in his cave
She was missing a tît
She smelled like shít
But think of the money he saved

[Dave]

Happy with that. Free sex and I've my own cave!

[BaggyTrousers]

I suspect Dot's daughter didn't quite grasp the parameters of the competition unless you are so far ITK that you work in Spanners.

[justinr73]

There once was a hooker called Best

Who had one eye on the Lions' First Test

So Les brought in Rob

Thought he'd do the job

But at the lineout we were dispossessed.

[Muddy Bless]

There once was a hooker called Best,
Who had a 50 inch chest,
With his shiny great head
I'd take him to bed
In a manner that Ashers would detest


I'm as gay as the next man

[Muddy Bless]

Our Ulster should soon dominate,
For bakebook is saying we're great,
Our set up is brill,
We are kings of the hill,
We just need to stop gettin bate.

[big mervyn]

I suspect Dot's daughter didn't quite grasp the parameters of the competition unless you are so far ITK that you work in Spanners.

Definite plagiarism In that one. Red card for pretty Polly.

[big mervyn]

Our band are a thing to behold
Their instruments gleaming In gold
They give some the horn
With their sliding trombone
But their timing leaves most of us cold

[BaggyTrousers]

Here the quality is rising biys, time to bring it down again so folk (not FOLK) don't get discouraged.

I give you:

It's a terrible shame for O'Connor
Who can play 3 games but no longer
The cause of this blow
On the body quite low
His busted wab is a goner.

There, quality & tone lowered in wan fell swoop.

[BaggyTrousers]

A Baldy barista named Black
His hairline dropped right down his back
If you search for some hair
You'll find nothing there
Unless you try his arsecrack

[BaggyTrousers]

There once was a hooker called Best,
Who had a 50 inch chest,
With his shiny great head
I'd take him to bed
In a manner that Ashers would detest


I'm as gay as the next man

Many of us are.