Silly Season Limerick Competition
Moderator: Moderators
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
Dave
Wrong that one was not written or composed by me that is a plagiarism of highest order
But it not being a verse of the " good ship Venus " I suppose makes it beyond your intellectual memory .
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Wrong that one was not written or composed by me that is a plagiarism of highest order
But it not being a verse of the " good ship Venus " I suppose makes it beyond your intellectual memory .
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Within this carapace of skepticism there lives an optimist
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
Ok, buckle up buckaroos. If yis are doin the filthy....
There once was a Vampire named Mable
Who's period was really quite stable
At every full moon
She'd whip out her spoon
And sup herself under the table...
There once was a Vampire named Mable
Who's period was really quite stable
At every full moon
She'd whip out her spoon
And sup herself under the table...
Support the Team, not the regime
Guinness is Good For You.
Guinness is Good For You.
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
That waankstain nucikunt is a cockweasel.
He kicked out Ruan for no reason.
I hope he chokes on his pipe
While getting bucked by a dyke
And a neck-stamp from our Vinny Jean Deysel
FOLK
He kicked out Ruan for no reason.
I hope he chokes on his pipe
While getting bucked by a dyke
And a neck-stamp from our Vinny Jean Deysel
FOLK
I have my own tv channel, what have you got?
-
- Warrior Chief
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Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
Thanks Baggy. Moved to the Moray Coast. Was either that or murder some f*cker at Stormont in frustration at the stupidity and bigotry of the vermin who the voting morons keep sending back there.BaggyTrousers wrote:jackthelad wrote:A Yank Ulster fan called Alice
Used Semtex to make a big phallus.
They found her vagina
In North Carolina
And part of her anus in Dallas
Liking your work Jack, good call on Deysel by the way, when you said you'd emigrated I hadn't thought it was to the FIRFU offices in D4.
Smear me in chocolate and throw me to the Lesbians.
- BaggyTrousers
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Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
Chance you might be "back in Europe" when wee Sturgeon leads Scotland to freedom.
NEVER MOVE ON. Years on, I cannot ever watch Ireland with anything but indifference, I continue to wish for the imminent death of Donal Spring, the FIRFUC's executioner of Wee Paddy & Wee Stu, and I hate the FIRFUCs with undiminished passion.
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
There was a young man from Madras
Who had a particular ass
Not hairy and pink
As some of you think
But - long eared ,grey and eats grass
The old ones are best -- PTQ circa 1959 - 63
Mary had a little lamb
Some chicken and desert
-- then gave the wrong address
The dirty little flirt
Doctor Bell fell down the well
And broke his collarbone
Doctors should attend the sick
And leave the well alone
True humour without vulgarity
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Who had a particular ass
Not hairy and pink
As some of you think
But - long eared ,grey and eats grass
The old ones are best -- PTQ circa 1959 - 63
Mary had a little lamb
Some chicken and desert
-- then gave the wrong address
The dirty little flirt
Doctor Bell fell down the well
And broke his collarbone
Doctors should attend the sick
And leave the well alone
True humour without vulgarity
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Within this carapace of skepticism there lives an optimist
- big mervyn
- Rí na Cúige Uladh
- Posts: 14396
- Joined: Fri May 09, 2008 2:22 pm
- Location: Overlooking the pitch (til they built the old new stand)
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
... and all the worse for it.rumncoke wrote:There was a young man from Madras
Who had a particular ass
Not hairy and pink
As some of you think
But - long eared ,grey and eats grass
The old ones are best -- PTQ circa 1959 - 63
Mary had a little lamb
Some chicken and desert
-- then gave the wrong address
The dirty little flirt
Doctor Bell fell down the well
And broke his collarbone
Doctors should attend the sick
And leave the well alone
True humour without vulgarity
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Volunteer at an animal sanctuary; it will fill you with joy , despair, but most of all love, unconditional love of the animals.
Big Neville Southall
Big Neville Southall
- BaggyTrousers
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Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
If I didn't think I'd be wasting my time I'd tell some clowns to get back on topic or shoes will be provided.
NEVER MOVE ON. Years on, I cannot ever watch Ireland with anything but indifference, I continue to wish for the imminent death of Donal Spring, the FIRFUC's executioner of Wee Paddy & Wee Stu, and I hate the FIRFUCs with undiminished passion.
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
The Barbarians are coming to Belfast town,
Three weeks of hard graft Ulster put down
Kiss so wanted the game
Two captains he did name
Jesus wept - what a clown
Three weeks of hard graft Ulster put down
Kiss so wanted the game
Two captains he did name
Jesus wept - what a clown
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
Baggy got pisssed - about his thread
Too much nonsense - he has read
Most from rum n coke
His neck he would choke
And bury his ass - beneath the shed
Too much nonsense - he has read
Most from rum n coke
His neck he would choke
And bury his ass - beneath the shed
I have my own tv channel, what have you got?
- BaggyTrousers
- Rí na Cúige Uladh
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- Location: España
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
When Ulster were on the up
We played in the Heineken cup
But now we're on a down
The SDC just makes me fron
No more on foreign rugby fields I'll sup
A poem on Ulster Rugby
When things go wrong and they won't come right
Though you do the best you can
When days are as dark as the hours of night
A pint of plain is yer only man
When money's tight and hard to get
And your horses has also ran
When all you have is heap of debt
A pint of plain is your only man
When health is bad and your heart feels strange
And your face is pale and wan
When the doctor says that you need a change
A pint of plain is your only man
When food is scarce and your larder bare
And no rashers grease your pan
When hunger gnaws and your meals are rare
A pint of plain is your only man
In times of trouble and lousy strife
You've still got a darling plan
You still can turn to a wonderful life
A pint of plain is your only man
When Ulster are poor and lose to dross
And we rush to blame yer man
Instead of angst, bile and getting cross
A pint of plain is yer only man.
With thanks to Ronnie Drew for the inferior first five verses.
We played in the Heineken cup
But now we're on a down
The SDC just makes me fron
No more on foreign rugby fields I'll sup
A poem on Ulster Rugby
When things go wrong and they won't come right
Though you do the best you can
When days are as dark as the hours of night
A pint of plain is yer only man
When money's tight and hard to get
And your horses has also ran
When all you have is heap of debt
A pint of plain is your only man
When health is bad and your heart feels strange
And your face is pale and wan
When the doctor says that you need a change
A pint of plain is your only man
When food is scarce and your larder bare
And no rashers grease your pan
When hunger gnaws and your meals are rare
A pint of plain is your only man
In times of trouble and lousy strife
You've still got a darling plan
You still can turn to a wonderful life
A pint of plain is your only man
When Ulster are poor and lose to dross
And we rush to blame yer man
Instead of angst, bile and getting cross
A pint of plain is yer only man.
With thanks to Ronnie Drew for the inferior first five verses.
NEVER MOVE ON. Years on, I cannot ever watch Ireland with anything but indifference, I continue to wish for the imminent death of Donal Spring, the FIRFUC's executioner of Wee Paddy & Wee Stu, and I hate the FIRFUCs with undiminished passion.
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
A limerick gets to the gist
Our "Dave " is in a red mist
Like a microwaved bunny
His rhymes are unfunny
He must be Brahams and Liszt
What's that to do with Ulster you say
Or how the team ought to play
Nothing at all
But I'm having a ball
Leaving that to another day
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Our "Dave " is in a red mist
Like a microwaved bunny
His rhymes are unfunny
He must be Brahams and Liszt
What's that to do with Ulster you say
Or how the team ought to play
Nothing at all
But I'm having a ball
Leaving that to another day
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Within this carapace of skepticism there lives an optimist
- big mervyn
- Rí na Cúige Uladh
- Posts: 14396
- Joined: Fri May 09, 2008 2:22 pm
- Location: Overlooking the pitch (til they built the old new stand)
Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
Is it not Flann O'Brien?BaggyTrousers wrote:When Ulster were on the up
We played in the Heineken cup
But now we're on a down
The SDC just makes me fron
No more on foreign rugby fields I'll sup
A poem on Ulster Rugby
When things go wrong and they won't come right
Though you do the best you can
When days are as dark as the hours of night
A pint of plain is yer only man
When money's tight and hard to get
And your horses has also ran
When all you have is heap of debt
A pint of plain is your only man
When health is bad and your heart feels strange
And your face is pale and wan
When the doctor says that you need a change
A pint of plain is your only man
When food is scarce and your larder bare
And no rashers grease your pan
When hunger gnaws and your meals are rare
A pint of plain is your only man
In times of trouble and lousy strife
You've still got a darling plan
You still can turn to a wonderful life
A pint of plain is your only man
When Ulster are poor and lose to dross
And we rush to blame yer man
Instead of angst, bile and getting cross
A pint of plain is yer only man.
With thanks to Ronnie Drew for the inferior first five verses.
Volunteer at an animal sanctuary; it will fill you with joy , despair, but most of all love, unconditional love of the animals.
Big Neville Southall
Big Neville Southall
- Gerald the Mole
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Re: Silly Season Limerick Competition
There was an oul cnut called Baggy
whose balls were grey and saggy
He once took a dump
Blamed it on Trump
And said it looked like Maggie
whose balls were grey and saggy
He once took a dump
Blamed it on Trump
And said it looked like Maggie